My steps get get slower in the snow
The picture of my family flaps in my frozen hands
I try to keep going
I try to move on
But I'm tired
Let me have one final dream
The friendly haze and small talk so inviting now--
I never meant to go this far, I really hope they know
Without a map or some directions I've got nowhere to go but on and on and on
In the snow I can see some of their faces
Happy, wrinkling lightly with the pure joy of living
Every song we ever sang is ringing through this frozen stillness
If I could walk a little father, maybe I could find my way back
No, I'd need a miracle for that.
And fogs my mind. I see them as shades,
A small light in the dimming snow
My hunger for home bests my one for closure
Until I'm a hollow shell
Alone in the cold.
Regrets and sin start floating in my mind
Family I lost
Friends I abandoned
These ideas begin to torment me
What I have I done with my life?
I couldn't see what I had until it was miles and miles away
I thought the frigid air would numb my heart and make this easier
When they find my ivory bones filled with flowers and melting snow
I hope they'll know I found what was most important to me
On a dark lonely road to my demise one night
Tell them I'm sorry, I'm lost, forgive me:
I w a s w r o n g
A life without you.
And I know every living soul avoids me when I walk,
Trees wither, animals run,
But I don't think I mind at all.
I whisper my wishes to the skies
And my love glides away with my demise.
Is stabbing me like a stone cold katana
And if my frozen hands could hold a dagger
I would be stabbing myself
Cause no amount of pain
Could measure up to the day that I left you
Every single regret visible in the wispy clouds of shortened, slowing breaths
I'd tell you that I need your warmth
I've never been so wrong
But every single step draws me closer to what I deserve for the things I put you through
When the time is up, I'll look to the heavens
And hope that you don't forget me,
Even if I'm an unnecessary burden
Every step I made killed me.
Tiny, atomic explosions rock me from the core.
Until I rot away to nothing.